Christmas
by XVampireEsmeX
Summary: Edward has left Carlisle and Esme to follow another path. Carlisle and Esme's first christmas alone.


I don't own anything

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Esme was stringing up a long line of twinkling lights around the window, smiling as she heard Carlisle humming a christmas song to himself.

She giggled as his arms came round her waist, lifting her off the steps and spinning round. Placing her down he took her face in his hands and kissed her.

"Edward has written to us"

Esme felt both saddened and happy, Edward was communicating with them, but he wouldn't come home for Chirstmas, he was spending it alone.

"What did he say?"

"He just simply said he hopes we have a good christmas and not to miss him, he has made a friend in Canada"

"So he's not alone on christmas?"

"No"

Esme smiled, that was a comfort to her.

"He also says he knows we love him and hopes we will forgive him for leaving, but it is simply something he has to do"

"Oh I know what he's doing and I wish he wouldn't but I cannot blame him, it was his choice not ours"

"Yes, I agree I do not approve of his choices lately, but I am glad he is alive and communicating with us"

Esme smiled, shaking her head.

"Enough of this, it's Christmas eve and I intend to spend it with my husband in a much more pleasurable way than this"

"Well then my dear wife, I cannot deny you that"

He pulled her in for a kiss before releasing her and starting on his way to the stairs, only being stopped by Esme holding his hand.

She smiled, rushing out and returning with a present for him, not what he had been expecting to do.

Opening it he found a new journal, leather bound and embossed with the Cullen family crest, his name in silver down the spine, the paper thick and crisp white, a glass fountain pen in swirled blue and grey was beside it.

"Esme it's beautiful"

She smiled, her hands clasped infront of her as she always did when she was excited for others reactions.

"Really? You like it?"

"I love it"

He pulled her to him with one arm, the journal and pen in the other hand as he span them round the room.

Soon they were twirling and spinning round the living room, the present now on the table.

"Perhaps we could take this upstairs my love?"

"If you so wish Carlisle"

With no more encouragement he lifted her up and rushed up the stairs.

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Early next morning was interrupted by Carlisle's pager, Dr. Turner was ill and Carlisle had to cover.

"I'm sorry Esme but I'm needed, I really wish I didn't have to go in but there is nothing I can do"

"I understand"

He kissed her goodbye before leaving for work, unaware of how truely upset his wife was.

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Esme decided to use her time in a productive way, so going to the kitchen she prepared to bake.

The house soon filled with the scent of ginger, cinnamon and sugar, sweet scents that would have been delicious had she been human.

The gingerbread didn't turn out as she had hoped, burnt around the edges and crumbling, dumping them in the bin she abandoned that, she couldn't take the smell any longer.

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The presents were left under the tree, wrapped and piled high, ready to be opened. It was a sad sight, Christmas afternoon and there was no joy, no happiness in the house.

Esme sat infront of the fire, venom filling her eyes.

This was the first christmas she had ever spent alone.

Last Christmas she had Edward and Carlisle, the christmas before she had her baby even though the little child was growing inside her she still had him. Even when Charles was at war she had her sister...but now, now she was alone.

She sometimes felt Carlisle cared more about his work than her, she knew she shouldn't be so selfish, but every time they became close Carlisle was called to work, it seemed the only time she could ever be intimate with him, or just be with him for longer than half an hour was if she pre-booked it...would it be the same for the rest of thier marriage? Would she always be second best to his work?

She scolded herself for thinking such awful things, he was giving up his time to save others, doing something he loved to do...he once did for her.

Esme suddenly realised Carlisle was at the hospital, alone, on christmas, the thought upset her more than her own loneliness.

But he was busy and she was not, the time was dragging and she had nothing to occupy her from the horrible thoughts.

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Esme soon found herself at the top of the cliff from thier home, the snow thick around her feet. She looked over the edge, it looked gloomy and dull.

"Esme?"

Carlisle sounded concerned and as she turned she saw the worry in his eyes, the sadness as he saw how upset she was.

"What's wrong?"

"I've never been alone on Christmas before"

She was in his arms in less than a second, held close as the cold wind swirled round them.

"I never ment to leave you and I swear if you had told me I would never have gone in"

"No your work is important to you, I won't stop you doing something you love"

"You are more important to me Esme, I would give up my job forever to keep you happy"

"You'll never have to, it makes you happy and that makes me happy"

"Forgive me, I didn't truely consider you in this. I promise never again will you spend even a second of your christmas alone again"

She smiled, taking his hand as she walked towards the house.

"Come, I have a present I'm sure you'll appreciate"

With her husky voice and little wink he lifted her up and rushed to the house, eager to make the most of his christmas with his wife.

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